Who is victimizing you and how to get out of it?

With an active toddler, an overloaded mom, and an easy-going dad, things can get messy at home. On occasions when that happens, my wife and I wonder: “how can I accomplish anything around the home with things thrown everywhere – clothes, toys, books, diapers just to name a few, and never-ending dishes and laundry?” Then we think: “I can’t do anything since things are messy all around me and I don’t know where to start.” But soon the painful truth catches up to us, we need to clean up the house to keep things moving sanely.

My goal of mentioning the above example is to introduce you to the problem of victimization. Let’s think now for a moment about it. Have you ever been under the influence of something which made things messier for you? Like an unattended house can create chaos, the untended problems of life can victimize you. In this article, I will talk about what some of these problems are, who is victimizing you, and how you can get out of it to have peace.

Some issues which victimize a person include:

–       Anger

–       Unforgiveness

–       Entitlement

–       Envy

–       Drugs

–       Alcohol

–       Worry

–       Pornography

–       Pride

–       Doubt

The Devil’s love for victims

In the same way that an unattended home can get messy, these above problems can take over and ruin your life. There may be and there will be several causes one can attribute to their troubles such as genetic predispositions or pressures from the environment. There is however one person who wants you to continue that way and he loves to see you caged. That is the Devil. Yes, the Devil loves victims because they are easy to control and manipulate. If you allow yourself to be subjected to a mode of feeling helpless, you provide a smooth path for the Devil to take control.

There is no human being in this world who is unredeemable.

Here are some statements by a person who is a victim:

– I am too messed up

– I am beyond recovery

– No one can help me

– It is too hard to change

– It is not my fault

– I don’t deserve to help

– I enjoy it

– I don’t want to change

As you can see, all the above statements are far from the truth and self-defeating. I used to think some people will never change or get better. Now I am increasingly convinced that that was not the right attitude. There is no human being in this world who is unredeemable. You just need to get out and find help.

Self-care – Eight ways to do

It is probably you.

It is very important, however, not to continue blaming the Devil as the sole reason for your victimhood. There is another person who can victimize you and it happens too often. That person is you. Don’t live in a state of denial. You will continue to suffer until and unless you take responsibility. The moment you seek help you win or at least are on the right track to win. Unlike many think you won’t look weak when you seek help. If you don’t seek help for problems, it can pull and drag you down to misery.

Where to find peace?

For the next part, I will spend some time on two bible verses connected to the topic. What I like about this verse is the variety of ways in which it brings meaning and comfort in different contexts to millions around the globe. That is an attestation to the redeeming power of God and His Word.

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

(Matt. 11:28-30 NKJ)

Jesus Christ is inviting you to His presence. The above verses are profound and deserve your attention. Let me try to unpack them.

–       Come to Me all who labor and are heavy-laden

Who would deny the weariness which temptation and/or sin can cause? Those are burdensome and tiring. The universal invitation of the Lord to His presence is relevant for those who are victims worn out by their problems and failures. Christ Jesus understands your struggle and wants to be on your side. In his book Overcomer, Pastor David Jeremiah writes the following. “The devil is too strong for us. We cannot overcome the devil or his temptations without the presence of God in our lives.”

–       I will give you rest

Many who become addicted to a certain type of sin like drugs, alcohol, or porn use it to relieve the pressures of life. This is however momentary. No one would agree, including those who are victims, that any of those things can bring peace to their heart. Engaging in some addictions may momentarily numb the problems which one is trying to avoid. But the mounting troubles will set you up for a deep fall. Christ promises to give you peace, whatever be the burdens weighing you down.

–       Take My yoke

As the verse continues Christ explains that you cannot be idle but need to take His yoke. This is significant in many regards. Very often counselors advise to “start taking responsibility for life.” The key idea I want to build on in this article is to look for help if you find yourself in a position as a victim.

The yoke metaphor given by Jesus is fascinating and real. It means He comes by your side to your aid. That is the way to find rest for your souls. Imagine the greatest Counselor the world has ever seen walking by your side to help you. That is exactly what Christ is offering.

–       Learn from Me

When someone is a victim, in a certain way they may be hard-hearted. I know this is not pleasant to hear. Victims lack the attitude of being a learner. But here Christ is encouraging you to come and learn from Him. This is not a one-time event, but an ongoing requirement because problems keep coming regardless of one’s maturity. It is very important to have a humble and teachable heart so that you can learn from Christ and permit Him to support you.

Being a winner.

The apostle Paul writes, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery” (Gal. 5:1 NIV). That also means there are plenty of reasons around, real or perceived, to defeat you. Regardless of the depth of or reasons for your victimhood, there is help available. You can’t do it alone. No other person in the world can also finely do that job for you. There is only one person who is superiorly qualified and abundantly willing to help you out. This is an offer you don’t want to reject!

Dijo John

(I encourage you to make use of the resources provided through the hyperlinks in this article)

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